Issue #15 Anniversary 2007

That's it, OTF is now a decade old. As is fitting in those events, a birthday party was organised over the last weekend, and all of the server's friends and classmates, along with some random people, were invited. Cakes and orange juices were had, and looks of silent dread were exchanged by various guests while OTF wasn't looking. After all, everyone knows how troublesome ten year olds can get. Luckily, however, the celebrations went without a hitch. There were no broken windows, and spillings were reduced to a minimum.
But if you want a full and detailed accounting of this year's events, Comms is currently working on releasing the Yearbook, which I encourage you to read when it's made available.

Until then, I hope you enjoy this edition. In addition to the usual hilarity, our VCIC has been kind enough to spare some of her busy time to provide us with a guest article.

Read on!

Hobbie Acting Editor-in-Chief

Hello Everybody! First things first. I have to talk about two things and then I can talk about whatever I want to talk about.

1) Awards! W00t! From the OZD side of things, Dmitri, Mezoti and Kayanna have been diligently plugging away to help bring these to you. Yay! Subsequently, if you don’t like your award, blame Hobbie. Anyway, thanks guys for your involvement and work to make this happen!

2) Yearbook! I don’t know if the link is up yet, I haven’t had a chance to check myself, but be sure to peruse the yearbook for the OZD year end update, as well as Dmitri’s Special Anniversary Speech wherein he may or may not confess his undying love for Mr. Darcy. I haven’t seen it yet myself so I don’t know, but you just never know when Dmitri will get that dreamy eyed look and start spouting poetry.

As for me, I look back on the year and wonder. I wonder how it is that after ten years I’m still here! I wonder when it is I will finally go buy new underwear. I wonder how it is I am in two departments and I do next to nothing in either of them but I keep winning awards for it. I wonder what I’m going to do Friday night. I wonder why birds appear every time Dmitri goes near Mr. Darcy. I wonder why they keep letting me write the OZD report. I wonder when it will be that I will have something relevant to say in this segment.

Happy Tenth, OTF! As a true old timer, thanks for ten years of entertainment, wedgies, occasionally twisted politics, armory abuse, fun and friends! When it comes right down to it, I am darn proud of this place. And if I had friends who cared, I'd brag about it all the time. Sometimes I do anyway. Thanks to all of you for being a part of the coolest corner of the internet.

Word, yo.

Polson
_{Department of Something or Other}

So there was a knock on my door at around noon yesterday. Hobbie came in and said he wanted to me to write the Senate Update after he had bugged me for an hour on who in the SW affiliation should get awards. I gave everyone platinum. Is everyone cool with that? But for the report, I’m not sure what he expected me to write down since I send a slave to the Senate meetings and attempt to read his footnotes on the meetings only every now and then. That reminds me… I should feed Dmitri…. Hmmm… Anyway, the rumbling of his stomach distracted me. So what has the Senate been up to?

It may look like the Senate has been quiet as of late, but I blame the 30th Anniversary. Everyone has dug out all their movies and ran mini-marathons watching the movies and only stopping to attend Majin’s Trivia events. Then there’s that Harry Potter distraction… But really… we have been up to no good as usual. We have some plans for the 30th Anniversary of Star Wars, but Iain’s updates caused us to pause for bit. Other than that, we’ve been gathering some material to update the chatroom with including avatars, etc. Also some finishing touches were made on the Senate timeline, so that will be updated soon too. Of course, we are still going to do Majin’s report for when he went to the Star Wars Celebration. This stuff was kind of delayed and now we don’t want it to interfere with the OTF Anniversary, but we promise we are going to get some stuff out.

Other than that, everyone, including the Senate, Hobbie, and I are in the OTF’s 10th Anniversary mode. There are the awards and there are all the goodies that comes with the Anniversary to think about. So Hobbie gave me more work and told me I actually had to do something this month. So I’m doing something… enjoying The Blue Report Senate Report? Wait… that didn’t look right. The report on the Senate in The Blue Report? We’ll go with that.

Seriously, did I just hear someone whine that they want Bria back? You know what… I’m going to back to bed. Either I’ll be woken up again for next month or you might get Bria back. I haven’t decided. But by the way, while I’m writing something let me set the record straight… I do not just randomly shoot Mr. Luc Deathstryke as last month’s The Blue Report showed. My publicist has requested they admit their mistake and point out that Luc has deserved it every time I have shot him out. I feel better now.

Seriously though… I hope everyone has enjoyed the Anniversary. Hard to believe it’s been 10 years since we found nothing to do online together. Everyone has worked hard and this is a great time to reflect upon not just the decade we’ve been online, but also give credit where it has is due to help us get through another year. Let’s just hope that Hobbie makes it to next year… although if he keeps waking me up for these silly meetings in attempt to say we have to get things done…

Amanda Sielu Paris (CL7)
_{Star Wars DSC}

It was a momentous month for the fantasy genre, with the release of both a Harry Potter movie and book. Of course with everyone buying a ticket to see the latest movie and grabbing the supposed final installment of the series, we, the Wizards, seem to have veered a bit from our work. The Harry Potter trivia and book discussion went along as planned, though, and we would like to thank everyone who helped out and participated in those events.

Also last month, two new members were brought onto the Wizards Council: Aleka and Darth Malum. They were recognized as being two of the hardest workers among the ever-dwindling fantasy sector, and there's no doubt they'll make fine additions to the team. On that note, Aleka will be taking my place as the Blue Report editor from the fantasy sector starting next month - I decided that it was time to let someone else write for a change.

That's all for this edition; I could write more, but I don't like to ramble like some other people. I would, however, like to say congratulations to everyone who received a promotion and/or award at the anniversary. I promise that they'll be more stuff happening from the fantasy sector soon - keep a look out.

Blake
_{Fantasy DSC}

When Senator Soka isn’t blasting lamers in CCC or boring us with her uncalculated amount of Trivia knowledge…. she managed to secure a SW Patron of the Month award to her already impressive resume. While trying to distract her during Anniversary Trivia I snuck in an interview and this is what she had to say…

1. Where were you ten years ago when the OTF was created?
1997... Many memories, but none Internet-related, as I didn't have access yet at that time. I got that end of 1999, I think. In that year I didn't know too much SW yet either. I still was deep into ST then. I remember watching all the TOS-movies in one night once and having driving lessons early next morning. Other than that I was still in school at that time, 10th grade or so *shrugs*

2. Out of all the Star Wars movies, which would you have wanted to be in?
Any of the first 3... which means the old ones, not Episode-counts.

3. Would you make up a character or take place of an actor as one of the characters?
I'd be be just a person in the background, maybe in the Mos Eisley Cantina or Spaceport *nods*

4. As Star Wars Patron of the Month, you must get along with others… what is your secret?
My secret ... I'm a nice person actually and rarely bite, but don't tell anyone!<

5. What do you think the Jawas are really hiding in their robes?
Loads of Restraining Bolts to threaten 3PO Droids with if they don't be quiet after hours of babbling

6. Even though Star Wars is perfect as it is… what is one thing you would change about it?
Short of replacing certain people in the PT for real actors ... Take back the change to Anakin's ghost, give back good old Sebastian Shaw!

BLAST YOU, SOKA! She thwarted my plans and came away with one more SP point then me despite my evil plan to distract her. Perhaps next time we can entice her with a shinier award. Geesh, she’s demanding!

Amanda Sielu Paris (CL7)
_{Star Wars DSC}

The member who formerly earned the Fantasy Patron of the Month award was Korny (CL4).

1. How does it feel to be recognized with this award?
My ogliodendrocytes have never been happier in my entire life, however, I still feel the same as I did when I recieved it before - relatively undeserving with a dash of indifference

2. Since this is the anniversary issue, and you've been a member for Outpost 10F for quite a while, do you have a favorite memory of Outpost 10F that you would like to share?
My favorite memory is when I first entered a chat room and people virtually gasped with sheer delight because they were in the presence of pure, unadulterated awesomeness.

3. Do you have a favorite character from a fantasy series? If so, who is he/she?
Yes, magical, mystical unicorn riding Watson!

4. If you could be Fleet Admiral of Outpost 10F for one day, is there anything specific you would do?
I would give my dear Catwoman a Mirror Varla avatar while I had a Mirror Watson avatar and we could have an epic battle of the pink handlebar mustaches. Anyone who would question this would promptly get banned.

5. If you were going to be stranded on an island and could only take three books with you, what books would you take?
Wuthering Heights (it's my absolute favorite), The Complete Sherlock Holmes (can't be stranded on an island without Watson), and a sketchbook (with pencil so I could draw people to talk to on those lonely nights).

I would like to thank Korny for allowing me to conduct this interview.

Blake
_{Fantasy DSC}

To CL9:

Iain (ST) - Ah, Iain. Iain's been a phenomenonal contributor to OTF in his many different incarnations around the site. In appreciation of all his efforts over the years, the Powers That Be have seen fit to promote Iain to the fabled Rear. (Admirals) Congratulations Iain!

To CL8:

Luc Deathstryke (FY)

- You know, it's kinda tough when you need to talk about yourself getting promoted. I do my work because I love OTF, not for the promotions and any other accolades that I get. Granted it is nice to feel appreciated, one way or another, but that is never what it is about. But to those that reccomended me, thank you.

Ohm (FY)

- Wow, what can I say about Ohm. I think to start off AMAZING would be an excellent place to begin. His work ethic with the Wizards proved his leadership potential, a potential that was realised when he took over several months ago as the SM of Eng. Since then, Eng has become far more active then I can remember in recent memory, and I can only imagine what is to come in the future with him at the helm.

To CL7:

Majin Kaze (SW) - Leading Trivia, getting the Library running, contributing to the Senate, there doesn't appear to be anything in which Majin isn't involved. And to top it off he still find the time to spend ages in the chats. Congratulations, Mike, and try not to have too much fun with the custom avatars!

Mezoti (ST) - This promotion's very much well deserved. Mezoti's been a constant contributor to OTF as a long time-chatter, member of numerous departments and long-standing ISAer. In particular, Mezoti's been especially prominent this year, running the recent ST/SW Firefly Weekend, stepping up as AM2 of ISA and helping out within the OZD. Congratulations Mezoti!

To CL6:

Ayanna (ST) - Ayanna's been a consistent contributor to the departments and until recently, the OZD. Ayanna is now Phoenix TL of Trivia, a member of Engineeering and Communications and is always one of those friendly peeps in the chats ready to welcome newcomers- Congratulations Ayanna!

To CL5:

BC (FY)

To CL4:

Barja CoFor (SW)

ech1740 (ST)

To CL3:

Captain Torin O'Connell (ST)

Darkest_One (SW)

Darth_Colt (SW)

General_Veers (SW)

Joe Hologram (ST)

XANA,(the one who will destroy the world) (SW)

Since I was terribly busy with preparing this year's anniversary, I couldn't think of anything witty to write here. But then this is about the rank-o-matic anyway, and not about me (or so I claim), and thus let's not start babbling here. After all, this is not my blog (or so I claim).

Last month's contestant has been the ever lovely CL7 Osiris who has the honor of getting the rank Queen of the Chatslayers. It goes without saying, that the one who submitted this particular rank (none other than Fantasy's very own LOTR Guru Wolf Brother) will be one of those slayer-ed people in the chat, but that's another story that doesn't belong here.



Our next victim "contestant" is Trivia's very own (and newly promoted) CL7 Majin "Spidey" Kaze, III..



Remember: if you submit a rank - be nice.

Be happy!

CL6 Aeon
(Former Queen of Wheee)

OTF has been around now for ten years it is not the same place that existed in 1997. I think that is one of the strengths of OTF it changes over time and that has to be a good thing.

I know that I have been fortunate to be involved in various depts and now on the EC, I have enjoyed all that I have done at OTF and enjoyed a lot of what others have done as well.

I hope that we will continue to see OTF change and grow and perhaps be unrecognisable in a few years. I do wonder what kind of changes we will see, I know that I and a others would like to see dossiers change, I think that we could make these more fun and interesting, perhaps allowing again for some individualism to seen in them. I am not sure how much we can do and a lot of that does depend on others and what they can do.

I know that I would like to see OTF change again though not at the expense of the community that OTF is. I do feel that the folks that come chat, post on the forums, work in depts are the core and the heart of OTF.

I would love to hear from you on what you would like to see in OTF, can’t promise that it can be done, but I know that it is just not me, but the whole of the EC who would love to hear about changes you would like to make.

So please feel free to e-mail us all!

Hong
VCIC

61. EXT. TATOOINE - MOS EISLEY BROS - STREET (THE ONLY STREET).

The speeder pulls up in front of a rundown blockhouse cantina/nightclub/cream tea room on the outskirts (down the street at the end farthest away from the bright centre of the galaxy) of the spaceport. Various strange forms of transport,including several unusual beasts of burden, one Sinclair C5 and a Penny Farthing, are parked outside the bar. A Jawa dance troop runs up and begins to fondle the speeder whilst executing the Zombie dance from Thriller.

DEEPIO
I can't abide these Jawas. Disgusting creatures, no sense of rhythm.

As Osiris gets out of the speeder he tries to shoo the Jawa/s away (is Jawa the plural of Jawa? It sounds as if it should be, like sheep. Mind you, I've always liked sheeps as a word and shoop as singular. Maybe it's Jawai, like Mogwai, but able to be fed after midnight).

OSIRIS
Go on, go on, take your leg-dragging samba elsewhere. I can't understand how we got by those troopers. I thought we were dead. Oh... dead, my poor dead blue milk... oh... and relatives.

MA-JIN
Teh Force can have a strong influence on the weak-minded. You will find it a powerful ally, except when it really matters and then you're on your own.

OSIRIS
Do you really think we're going to find a spacebum/smuggler/diamond in the rough pilot here that'll take us to Alderaanduran? MA-JIN
Well, most of the best freighter pilots can be found here, which, come to think of it, is a bit odd, because if they're the best then surely they'd be in space, or somewhere popular... um... *cough* Osiriz, ignorz whut eyez sayed and watch your step. This place can be a little rough.

OSIRIS
I'm ready for anything, except perhaps falling in love with a long lost sibling. But then that's just never going to happen.

DEEPIO
Come along, Ajay.

62. INT. TATOOINE - MOS EISLEY BROS - CANTINA/NIGHT CLUB/CREAM TEA ROOM.

The young adventurer and his two mechanical servants (servants? servants? where's Herminone Granger and S.P.E.W when you need her?) follow Ma-Jin Kenobi into the smoke-filled cantina/night club/cream tea room. The murky, moldy den (you can see why those best freighter pilots wouldn't want to be anywhere else, right?) is filled with a startling array of weird and exotic alien creatures and monsters at the long metallic bar, and also Paris Hilton. At first the sight is horrifying. One-eyed, thousand-eyed, slimy, furry, scaly, tentacled, and clawed creatures huddle over drinks- and that's just Paris. Ma-jin moves to an empty spot at the bar near a group of repulsive but human scum (scum, repulsive? my, he knows how to flatter). A huge, rough-looking Bartender stops Osiris and the robots (what a great name for a band).

HAGRID
We don't serve tha' kind here- 'arry!

Osiris, still recovering from the shock of seeing so many outlandish creatures AND Paris Hilton, doesn't quite catch the bartender's drift, though considering his size we're probably talking about the continental kind.

OSIRIS
What?

HAGRID
Ya droids. Tha'll 'ave to wait outside. We dun wan' 'em 'ere.

Osiris looks at old Ma-Jin (not a droid), who is busy talking to one of the Galactic pirates, heretofore unmentioned because 'best freighter pilots' sounds better, don't you think? . He notices several of the gruesome creatures along the bar are giving him a very unfriendly glare (cue the theme from 'Love Story'). Osiris pats Deepio on the shoulder with a clang.

OSIRIS
Listen, why don't you wait out by the speeder. We don't want any trouble witht the genre-displaced half-giant.

DEEPIO
I heartily agree with you sir Lewsie, plus, I see the recent smoking ban hasn't made it to this pit of despair.

Deepio and her stubby partner go outside and most of the creatures at the bar go back to their drinks and cream buns. Ma-Jin is standing next to KypDBacca, an eight-foot-tall, savage-looking creature resembling a huge grey bushbaby monkey (but they're cute) with fierce baboon-like fangs. Its large blue eyes dominate a fur-covered face and soften an otherwise teh awesome! appearance. Over the matted, furry body KypDBacca wears two chrome bandoliers (containing various amusing supplies, none of which is a comb) and nothing else. KypD is a two-hundred-year-old Wookiee-cushion and a sight to behold. Ma-Jin speaks to the Wookiee-cushion, pointing to Osiris several times during his conversation and the huge creature suddenly lets out a horrifying laugh, giving the impression this was about to end with Osiris sold for parts. Osiris is more than a little bit disconcerted and pretends not to hear the conversation between Ma-Jin and the giant cushion. Osiris is terrified but tries not to show it, despite sweating like a Sandtrooper and emitting a few parps of gas. He quietly sips his drink through a paper straw, looking over the crowd for a more sympathetic ear or whatever appendage passes for auditory reception. A large, multiple-eyed Creature gives Osiris a rough shove.

CREATURE
Negola dewaghi wooldugger?!? Honk honk!

The hideous freak is obviously drunk, and in posession of a comedy car horn. Osiris tries to ignore the creature and turns back on his drink. A short, grubby Human (Tom Cruise?) and an even smaller rodent-like beast join the belligerent monstrosity.

TOM
He doesn't like you.

OSIRIS
I'm sorry.

TOM
I don't like you either.

The big creature is getting agitated and yells out some unintelligible gibberish at the now rather nervous, young adventurer (how can he be an adventurer? He hasn't gone anywhere. Can I be an adventurer if I go to the shops?).

TOM (Contd.)
Don't insult us. You just watch yourself. We're wanted men. I have the death sentence in twelve systems and Spaaaarta!.

OSIRIS
I'll be careful then.

TOM
You'll be dead!

The rodent lets out a loud grunt and everything at the bar moves away. Osiris tries to remain cool but it isn't easy, as he is secretly peeing his space pants. His three adversaries ready their weapons/car horns. Old Ma-Jin moves in behind Osiris.

MA-JIN
This little one isn't worth the effort. Come let me buy you something... a chocolate eclair perhaps? How about a cucumber sandwich with the crusts cut off-

A powerful blow from the unpleasant creature (pick one, not sure which we're talking about here) sends the young would-be Jedi sailing across the room- wheee! crashing through tables and breaking a large jug filled with blue milk (noooooooo!). With a blood curdling shriek, the monster draws a wicked chrome car horn from his belt and levels it at old Ma-Jin. The bartender panics.

HAGRID
No duellin' outside o' Hogwarts!

With astounding agility old Ma-Jin's lightsaber sparks to life and in a flash an arm lies on the floor, thankfully, not his own. The honking monster is cut in two. Ma-Jin carefully and precisely turns off his laser sword and replaces it on his utility belt. Osiris, shaking and totally amazed at the old man's abilities, if not his own flying-without-a-ship skills, attempts to stand. The entire fight has lasted only a matter of seconds. The cantina/nightclub/cream tea room goes back to normal, although Ma-Jin is given an exclusion zone at the bar. Osiris, rubbing his bruised head- the safest thing he could land on- approaches the old man with new awe. Ma-Jin points the Wookiee-cushion.

MA-JIN
This is KypDBacca. First-mate on a ship that might suit our needs.